Big Hair

I am usually satisfied with my physical state of being. I'm generally happy with my weight and my appearance. But if there is one thing I could change, I would wish that I could, for at least one day, have big hair. Like 80's New York girl poufy hair. I want to try it once.

See, I have the world's flattest, straightest hair.


See this flat iron? If I ever used it, you would never know. There would be no difference except for the fact I would own the most redneck hair instrument in the world.

My hair is beautifully straight and fine as can be. Unfortunately this means that no matter how you style it, it returns to it's naturally flat state.

Hairdressers are fascinated with my hair. They love to play with it and brush it, even if it isn't needed. But they quickly become frustrated with my hair the second they curl it or twist it up into something fancy. It took eighty bazillion bobby pins, several hours, and a bottle of hairspray to do my hair for the high school prom. It also took two hair dressers because one got tired and frustrated in the middle of it.


I would love to have big fluffy, curly hair for a while. A white girl Afro sounds awesome. I want hair that puts David Bowie's character in Labyrinth to shame. I could be an 80's refugee for a while. I would be awesome.


Fuck yeah!